20 Smashing Conker Jokes!
It’s a swing and a hit with these conker jokes! They’re perfect for the playground, or a rainy autumn day!
You’ll want to soak these jokes in vinegar and bake them in the oven before you get started (ask your parents. Or maybe your grandparents)! We’ve strung together some conker jokes and puns, so get ready to pick the best one and defeat your friends – with laughter! We’ve got lots more jokes waiting for you when you;re done – try some school jokes, lunch box jokes, and book jokes!
I wanted to write a conker joke…
But I just can’t string one together!
What did the conker write his physics paper about?
String theory!
Which kind of horse is the best at conkers?
The chestnut mare!
I’m always so tired after a game of conkers…
In fact, I’m completely conked out!
Why are chestnuts such good friends?
Because together you can conker anything!
Why are conkers so good at equestrian sports?
They’re horse chestnuts!
Why are chestnuts so good at sports?
They conker the competition!
I just won a conkers tournament…
I’m six-hausted!
What did Julius Caesar say when he won a game of conkers?
“I came, I saw, I conkered!”
What do you call a conker with a bad cold?
A hoarse chestnut!
What do you get if you drop a conker down your shirt?
A chestnut!
I have a cunning plan to plant chestnut trees all over the globe…
I’m going to conker the world!
My grandpa offered to give me his champion conker, but I just scoffed…
“THAT old chestnut?”
Our horse chestnut tree is so old…
It dates all the way back to William the Conkerer!
Why are conkers so anxious?
They tend to be highly strung!
I have a phobia of horse chestnut jokes…
But I WILL conker it!
What do a conker tree and my family have in common?
They’re both full of nuts!
The Romans conquered most of Britain – why did they stop?
They probably ran out of conkers!
What did Richard III cry out when he lost a game of conkers?
“My kingdom for a horse chestnut!”
Which tree seed ruled England in the 11th century?
William the Conker!
Want More Gags?
Check Out the Great Joke Generator!
